the IVF journey – part 1

I don’t know where to start..  but I have decided myself, whether it is a success or fail procedures, I will post my IVF journey. I believe there are a lot of people out there who have been struggling about the same thing as mine, that is “Trying to Conceive” (TTC).

For some of my closest friends, they knew how we have tried so hard to have a child, but for some people, they might just wonder, why we don’t have a child until now even though we have been married for 8,5 years. Sooo many questions came to me, to us, and I thank God that I was never been down being asked those questions.. my answer was always easy “we try, but it’s all depends on God’s timing. your prayer may help us”🙂 The most difficult one was actually if the question came from my parents. That makes me sad, really sad, because as a child I consider myself a failure, failure to make my parents happy.. failure to give a grandchild to my parents.

We had visited many doctors, we tried all kind of TTC treatments, from natural one, IUI (Intrauterine Insemination) or famously known as “inseminasi buatan” in Indonesian. and now, we are at the very last shot, we’re doing the IVF (In Vitro Fertilization) or “bayi tabung”.

It is truly a roller coaster ride to both of us, but I’m thankful that I have a supporting and loving husband, and family and friends who never stops praying for us *my tears literally drop while i’m typing this*. It was not an easy journey at all.

A call from my step-dad, made me finally brave enough to start the IVF which then lead us to the question “which doctor we’re going to see?” So, we decided to see dr Ivan Sini at Bunda International Clinic (BIC), which we have seen him 5 years ago (and fyi, my husband didn’t like him at all). At that time, we were still very young, so dr Ivan took it very easy and not taking any action except asking us to try conceiving naturally. But this time when we first saw him again on 12th 2015, i brought my old patient book, and he laughed.. so still no change? then it’s about time for us to do the IVF. haaaa!!

So what made us choose dr Ivan Sini even though my husband never really liked him? First, we have been praying together asking God to choose the most suitable doctor for us, and we found that Dr Ivan Sini is the right one. My husband wants to do the IVF in Jakarta, not Surabaya or Penang like I wanted to at the beginning, his excuse was.. “if we do it outside Jakarta, we’ll be apart for two weeks, and I cannot see your face everyday” hahaha. He never said such thing to me, so I reaaaallllyyyy took it very personally and hearing that brought me to tears.

Then, I believe this was not a coincidence that when we’re doubting whether we’ll go to IVF, we’re introduced to a couple which also have the same struggles to have a child. We’re married on the same year, only a month apart, but they have gooneee thru much more treatments than us, and they finally have a super beautiful baby girl after their 3rd IVF which they had it with Dr Ivan Sini. So we were able to share and discuss a lot with them, we can’t thank God enough how bless we are to know them, we’re totally blind about this IVF thing, and BOOM!! God sent us this couple.

What happened on our first consultation with dr Ivan about our issue? Dr Ivan found that my eggs reserves were not as many as they supposed to be. He only could find 4 follicles, which normally for women at my age will have at least 10 follicles at the beginning of the cycle. That totally blew me away, I almost cried on the spot, but Dr Ivan was quite positive, so I became positive. And I remember our friends told us, we only need one egg and one sperm to have a child, that was a total relief for me. and the doctor then asked us to do the blood tests, the screening test (HIV, hepatitis, AMH, and TORCH for me … and HIV, Hepatitis and sperm analysis for my husband) before we start the IVF procedure. The doctor also gave us a contact number, a nurse who will be in charge of taking care of all IVF patients, and I have to let the nurse know when my period comes the next month.

and the journey continues … I will share on my next post.

and for my other friends, and families whom we didn’t share our IVF plan.. come on, get a life! U guys should understand that it is not an easy journey. I don’t want people to keep asking me which will stress me out, and I hate the feeling if I failed the process then I have to explain everything all over again which will make me very sad to remember all that. I know some of our friends got very angry to not be shared about this, but hey, this is our life, and this is our rights to decide whom we want to share. Not all my families know about this, then why would we bother to share this to others?

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